Good to know I'll remain Toby Keith single free for another year.

I heard most of the tickets for the fall portion of her "1989" tour were given out with the purchase of a pumpkin spice latte at participating Starbucks.

In a related story, you can now get a new Toby Keith single whenever you buy a red plastic cup or the American flag.

Tolerable depending on the quality of weed they sell.

Only if the white guy wears it while using racial slurs.

If Trump has a mitigating factor, it's that even he ignores Scott Baio's desperate pleas for attention .

Tomi Lahren, definitely.

For those days when blackface just isn't enough.

You'll know the product works if they have days of calm, rational discussion on The View.

If only she had offered to pee on Norton, the entire tone of the interview would have been different.

They're too busy making excuses for Trump not winning the election.

Guys, I have a serious question… what IS an army of one? Is it like a street fighter?

Stephen Chow might be persuaded if you add more kicking to the script.

His fingers would be like cocktail wieners to it.

As The A.V. Club told us in its pre-Supper Club days, Whataburger will soon be making money hand over fist.

Little does Wonder Woman realize that the UN will revoke her membership pending the reviews of her movie next summer.

Somehow to his supporters, this makes Trump look presidential.

That's because he has regular sized digits, unlike a certain short-fingered vulgarian.

You're doing God's work.

Maybe the Winslows can hire Luke Cage to find their youngest daughter Judy, she just vanished between the end of the fourth season and the start of the fifth.