It was cool. All I had to do was go a mere two miles south of my house and I was in totality—for a minute and some change. I went to a park overlooking the Mississippi. There was no planned event, just people of all walks taking it in. Everyone oohed and awed as the cicadas chirped as darkness crept in and the…

They should run it out of town on a rail.

Several years back I was volunteering at a chili cook off and this guy said he had hot sauce that he would only give one pinhead sized drop on a saltine cracker. I took it thinking it couldn't be that bad, then ran to the nearest condiment stand and downed some mustard as it seemed like the best idea at the time.

Cause of and solution to

Wait wasn't that a band?

Or the blackboard having you stay after class to bang the teacher

Moon shaped?

Probably not. I think her career will fade to black just like the series finale of The Sopranos 8 weeks ago.

Wait it's not 2007 anymore?
We aren't discussing the new season of "My Name is Earl"?

Do not touch Willie
Good advice!

Poochie the Droid

When do we get "The Hammerhead Story"?

"The Count's Can Hider"

Or in this case suckin Frank Stallone

Friday is the day to take out the trash.
In this case an oozing hefty bag of rotgut whiskey bottles and cigarette butts.

I don't like to use the word "hero"very often but…

Definitely agree with education. But one of the Tiki Torch fucksticks who was all over the news was from one of the tonier suburbs around here. There are plenty of upper middle class creeps in that crew along with those from the poor side of the tracks.

Yep, he could be brought down with one Saigon Kick

I know, it's a shame he's gone
We still have Dolly though

Hannidate is a thing apparently.