Can confirm; am sitting down.

Eventually. But it took him a while to get there.

But they still made better use of Katana than Suicide Squad.

The diary he keeps in the office is probably literally a work diary - appointments, schedules, boring crap like that. There may be the occasional reference to confidential sources, but he's old enough that he probably still uses shorthand occasionally, so it may be incomprehensible.

He started out pretty terrible. When he first appeared, my brother and I had an argument over whether he was meant to be South African or Australian. Either way, we agreed he was missing the mark.

"God is a bachelor, and he's angry!"

Jonah hitting his head (and then his arm while trying to punch his desk) over and over was my rewind moment.

Evil Afghan Kamal Khan in Octopussy.

This is Britain. We're used to white people being terrorists over here. Police are about as likely to shoot you for having a dodgy accent as for being the wrong colour.

Just think, in another timeline Zoe Saldana is the Phil Coulson of the Crossroads Cinematic Universe.

Curtains block out natural light, make it harder to stare broodingly out across the city, and make it nigh-impossible for passing enemies to spy on you when you're naked.

Somebody drove a car into a crowd in London last night. Police are treating it as a terrorist attack. Shocking twist: The crowd was mostly Muslim.

Zoe Saldana - the female lead of one great nascent sci-fi franchise, one mediocre one, and one terrible one with pretty visuals.

Rocki Whore Picture Show had better not be mainstream straight porn.

Wait, there's actually a person working under the mononym of "Macklemore"? I assumed that was just a particularly heavy-handed punchline.

That's sad. Say what you like about the lazy titling of modern porn parodies, but they usually show signs of coming from a place of love, or at least a place of basic research. I mean, apparently they released an edited version of the Star Trek: The Next Generation porn parody that hung together as an actual episode…

We need a road trip series. The Adventures of Dead Wife and Ginger Minge.

I have no idea how you came to that conclusion. She was from Perivale, she was studying for her A-levels before the time storm took her to Iceworld (so probably not that dystopian), when they visited her home time there was nothing to suggest it was anything other than the present day, her mother was born in the…

So just cocaine and breath mints, then.

Yeah, they actually put in the work there, and she took a lot of beatings. If they hadn't started the process by killing Sara, the AV Club commentariat might have been a lot more friendly to the process.