Well, I am from Britain, the country that took the "aggressive drug dealer" trope to a whole new level. Twice.

Oh, and just because everybody seems to be repeating the error: It's Michiel Huisman.

It really is. I'm pretty certain that, one day soon, they'll be using it as a teaching aid in film school to explain the concept of "show, don't tell".

Listen, didn't I just say I hated freedom?

Oh, wait, yes, Castle is the one that lost its female lead and then realised it was time to quit; I had it confused with Sleepy Hollow, which lost its female lead and then decided there was no reason not to keep lurching on, eating human flesh and slowly rotting.

Explain like I'm a five-year-old who hates freedom: What, exactly, is the Republican National Convention going to achieve other than presumably revealing Trump's VP pick? I mean, that seems like a lot of coverage for something that could be covered in a single tweet.

Nelson Mandela: Self, Mandela's Fight for Freedom

James Brolin was also Jeff Winger's dad in the fart season of Community, and Castle's dad in the much-decayed Castle. Which obviously means we have to consider them brothers.

And of course Donald Sutherland was also the original Watcher to the original Buffy the Vampire Slayer.

David Hasselhoff is going to be in the new Sharknado movie because they offered to give him some money. And because, let's face it, it's easier than panto. And also less dignified, obviously, but still.

"You cock-juggling thundercunt" is probably the single greatest line that I will never be able to say out loud.

I watched Slow West, which is dreamlike and stunningly beautiful and brutally violent and occasionally brilliantly funny. I don't think I've ever had occasion to use the phrase "pitch-black slapstick", but I don't think there's any other way to describe the scene with the salt.

Is Basketball Wives LA going to address the question we're all wondering about: What exactly are the mechanics of sex with somebody who is literally two feet taller than you?

I don't want to be the crazy guy in the tinfoil hat, but I feel I should throw out the possibility that Erdogan might have deliberately organised, or at least allowed, this half-assed coup just to increase his own popularity and enable him to purge hostile elements within the military.

Thinking on the words of the poet Skee-Lo, while perfectly happy with my current height, I would actually quite like to be a baller. That degree of athleticism would probably be enjoyable, at least if I could avoid injury. And I do wish I had a girl who looked good; not only would I call her, I would also text, email…

I had Friday off work. I got up in the morning, turned on the TV, saw the news from France, and made an informed and rational decision to spend the day eating ice cream and marathoning the first season of Gilmore Girls, which I hadn't watched since I was younger than Lorelai.

Killing off Astra and letting her incredibly boring husband take on her role as main villain was Supergirl's single biggest misstep.

I'd never heard of him before that show, so I was kind of confused why so many people seemed to automatically dislike Derek.

I really hope they changed the ending from Shakespeare. And heavily upgraded the main characters' ages. And removed at least some of the weirder stuff with the nurse.

Man, Friday could have been a little more subtle in his bragging.