Ah, yes it is. I always had the worst time seeing the magic eyes with words and not just a picture of a sailboat or a penis. Or a penis on a sailboat.

No, Kirk really likes the excessive consumerism around Christmas because buying shit reminds him that Jesus was a baby who literally shit in a diaper.

If Nic Cage doesn't scream is he really Nic Cage?

I played ET on Atari. Thanks for reminding me of *that* trauma.

Cut. It. Out.

Sorry, I never trust a big butt and a smile.

To be blunt, it will never feel like work if you truly love what you do. And if you're really fucking high while doing it.

Whatevs. I'm gonna make $50k a year rolling blunts! Top that Cornelia!

You know shit is bad when even herpes won't touch you.

I have a memory of when I was 2 I was chasing my cousin around a coffee table, slipped on a toy, and ended up splitting my earlobe in half. Next thing I remember is at the ER being under a blue sheet with a hole cut into it so they could stitch me up. It was a very traumatic thing for a two year-old so I assume…

There better be a 3 month boat ride to get to England.

Mmm…..friend chicken. Yum.

One of my friends dated a boy in high school who wore a shirt that said "Stiffy Lube". For their first date he took her to the local Chinese buffet - I'm sure he was wearing the Stiffy Lube shirt being a fancy occasion and all that. At the end of the meal he told her they had to go in the back and clean their dishes…

Don't tell Scotty, Scotty doesn't know.

This makes sense. Everyone knows wiping your butt with a gold hand is the only way to go after eating some hot Dornish peppers.

And I thought the joke was going to be that Satan invented Clippy.

Black Schlong

Ah, nevermind. Will be interesting to see how it all plays out then.

Word is the author who wrote the screenplay reworked the final third of the book for the movie.

And Bunny and we like the boom