"Here is the lesson you must learn my son. In the oil business you don't want to drink it. Tastes bad. Wastes the product."

I thought it was great how they were all in purgatory or space or something.

I laughed but I was already laughing before I started the video and I'm still laughing now.

I'm always looking for the guy that reminds me of Charlie Manson in my religion class.

Has the word "anal" in the title. According to our research 94% of people will stop and watch anything with the word anal in the title.

I would have called it How I Met Your Anal Prober.

Yes I believe she was 38 years old when the show started filming.

Oh honey. Don't listen to them. They hate us because they ain't us. Are you going to believe I'm a liar or are you going to believe the truth of my lips and loving arms?

The actress who played Granny Clampett was 8 years younger than the actress that played Elly May on The Beverly Hillbillies. Interestingly enough the actor that played Jethro was some sort of freaky 7 year old they found in Alabama who had that Benjamin Button disease.

Cheech and Chong are comedy legends. Supertroopers is not funny. It's not funny when a cop does a shitty job and fucks with people. Cops aren't funny. They are only funny when they are the butt of a joke not the aggressor.

Up in Smoke features the funniest scene of two people getting pulled over in the history of film.

Hopefully this will help sell the movie I've been writing. It's called "My Crackpipe is Also a Spaceship" and Andy Dick is very interested in playing the titular crackpipe/spaceship.

If you don't laugh at Cheech and Chong you have no soul.

I've had a way better life than stupid Frank Zappa. For one thing I named my two children Yodolaywho and The Cosmic Burrito.

The OJ Simpson version of this is pretty hard to live up to. First off young OJ has all these amazing accomplishments on the football field. Then OJ launches this amazing acting career. Then as he gets older he gets away with murdering some people. It's like every year he does something newsworthy and amazing!

Jagger remembers me because I accidentally pooped.

David Bowie and I have a lot in common. First off we both have a large collection of top hats. Secondly we both use a wide variety of aliases. Lastly we both have fucked Mick Jagger.

I do favor the more holidays policy yet I'm opposed to the honoring of racists policy.

So you people put a crackhead in charge of the third largest city in America? You know once America elects Trump and figures out this whole ISIS nonsense we might have to come up and help you guys out.

Maybe you do but when I googled "Arizona hockey team" the top results were mostly about some sort of sex act that is popular at Arizona State.