I like the silly man who gets scared while playing the video games.

Main stream Republicans would never believe that conspiracy theory nonsense. We focus on real issues like Obama's birth certificate and how all the scientists are lying about global warming.

I like free market solutions to problems.

Healthcare? We need solutions not your weird theories comrade. Is healthcare going to stop ISIS? My Republican solution to this problem is everyone gets an AR-15. At least the women and children.

Donald and Melania are going to guest star in the new season of Game of Thrones. They will play a pair of "classy Lannisters" who attempt to warn Westeros of the menace the Summer Islanders pose to the nation.

Reggie Watts is hilarious on Comedy Bang Bang. I like his standup too but I haven't seen much. I think he would be a good pair with Colbert. He does cool deadpan well, might pair well with Colbert's vibe.

Holy shit is Jon Batiste a bore. That is the worst Prince story I've heard in the last 2 days. Colbert's new show really sucks and I think he is a small reason why. How does Colbert have the least cool band in late night? Reggie Watts should be paired with Colbert but then again I know CBS finds it important to…

Dodgeball has a grown man acting like a fucking pirate. It's a joke so unfunny it actually annoys me to think about it.

I also watched Trainwreck for the first time this weekend. John Cena was funny. The second half of that bad movie really could have used him. The celebrity intervention. Wow that was bad. No one tells a joke like Chris Evert.

Not me. I imagine '70's super stud Fran Tarkenton.

Why would anyone try to share the stage with Prince? He could destroy you at any second. Run Tom Petty Run!

It would be classic Prince if it actually did self destruct upon his death.

In Lake Wobegon we drink the blood of outsiders caught here after 5 pm. It keeps Garrison young, the women strong, the men good looking, and all the children above average

I would have loved to hear President Romney tell the story about the time his family accidentally heard the first half of Darling Nikki while travelling to the Grand Canyon in 1985 and that's why radios are no longer allowed.

I can't wait until they make a movie about the guy that founded Taco Bell, Jimmy Bell. Jimmy Bell's intense hatred of people having normal bowel movements is exactly the type of emotion a great actor can tap into. It will be an Oscar winning performance.

Happy to see Michael Keaton appearing in more movies. This looks like it could be good. He was amazing in Birdman.

Ok. Ignore me. Listen to this idiot. Go watch Entourage. You deserve it.

This stoner recommending Entourage to other adults is one of first times I've actually seen the harmful effects of smoking too much pot.

"There’s nothing else in that plotline except cannabis. That does get a little annoying."

The last time I did cocaine I read 8 books to my children in 15 minutes.