Would definitely keep the page boys on their toes.

It's not food based, but we'll let it slide

gee whiz, way to defend bowie there, dik

holy shit, they have shroud of turin yoga pants, too? Oh, happy day!

Beats the old one. The title music to Birth of a Nation is just so repetitive.

Isn't that a Texas Abortion?

Dik likes his men pale as fuck and alien lookin'

I dunno, I always got a bit of a "doth protest too much" vibe from him.

The presidential fitness program has also been updated, now it is just eat two Big Macs in under 3 minutes and name all the racial slurs you know.

Why, it's blasphemous AND dryer friendly? I'll take two pleez!

Soundcloud ain't so bad yet, I've had a playlist on for at least 3hrs and just heard the first ad. Eh, they let go almost half their staff and NOW they're doing ads? Coincidence!

Cabinet position & Swiss bank account pleez!

This is one of those two things situations, me thinks.

Boom, repeal ACA and replace it with a broken hamster wheel!

Yeah, @Dikachu:disqus some people like tiny, hairy

Woahhh, that escalated so quickly!

Definitely!

Choking hazard!

Hurrrrgh, moderate-to-extreme physically, mentally and sexually abusive?

Tsk tsk, shoulda had a will.