“This is a true story..."

Title card: Weyland-Yutani Research Facility, Fargo, North Dakota.

Play the Grand Prize Game from the Bozo Show. When I was very little I used to practice that shit relentlessly in the back yard and at the beach (wind permitting) in the HIGHLY unlikely case that we would ever be in Chicago, that we would then attend a Bozo taping, and that I would get picked to play.

Alien: Earth

We’ll probably learn that the Xenomorphs aren’t that scary once you get to know them and they assimilate much as other immigrant groups do. They do have a problem with getting drunk from spoiled milk, though.

Sure is great that Governor Abbott is spending money to put razor wire in a river and pay some gun thugs to harass both immigrants and federal border patrol workers, instead of fixing the electrical grid that seems to fail at least yearly. This republican trifecta government sure is working out well for everyday…

In my little section of West Alabama, whenever we have power outages following a massive storm, we offer the utility workers some food and drink while they work to show our appreciation. I’m serious. We usually have our power restored faster than everyone else.

The Curse was robbed.

We just are so much better than this.

I can’t even tell whether this is satire.

The convicted felon is such a dimwit he’s stepping on the toes of one major  contributors in Musk. I’ve read Elon will be spending $180 million to get the con-man his office back.

“I was talking to a car company executive. Big guy. Tough guy. And he came to me. Tears in his eyes. Crying like a baby. Sir, he said. Sir please take away the electric. We’re trying to do gas. We like the gas. Gas is good. So the battery. Wind! And the military. Oh. The planes are gas. No electric for the planes. Can…

tRump is an idiot and a traitor.  So is anyone that still supports him.

Since Donald The Felon has a whole list of mental illnesses that he’s been written up suffering from:

“If Electric is so good, how come people have such trouble with Battery? AA, AAA, C, bing bong bing, if Battery good, how come you have have to charge them, charge them, they charge too much for a battery. I went, I went to the store for Battery, and when I saw Price, I said, I said, I said ‘Price too much!’ Battery…

Now they just need to get their comments section off Kinja and we can finally leave the nightmare of the Herb Years behind.

I’ve known of Gwar since like the aughts, but this is the first time I’ve watched them perform or speak. I didn’t realize they weren’t scary but more like...cartoon characters?

Yep, this is completely awesome. AVC is officially back, baby!