Hey now, Shep Smith is a national treasure. I can't wait until he finally snaps and burns down their studios.

I really do need to edit my joke note cards.

Betty's vagina begs to differ with this.

Would.

No, Jones. Nothing ever happens in Jones.

I think she has the deck stacked against her by being named after the shittiest month of the year.

I'd fuck Will Forte even if he wasn't the last man on earth.

We're all just skeletons in the end. - A Doctor but not The Doctor.

The crypt, I assume.

A cyberpunk future of underground skeleton hackers sounds pretty fucking rad.

Have they considered it might be skeletons? They have a long track record of hating people with flesh and life.

I would know, and that's what matters.

Harper, I don't believe this is an earnest response to my commentary on the way Call of Duty approaches the topic of foreign conflicts. I am happy for you, about your new Mercedes, but perhaps this is not the best place to talk about it? Just seems like a bit of a non sequitur.

[CUE FUNKY HORROR MUSIC]

I never had the opportunity to mention it before, but I've always wanted your Disqus name.

Thank god Courtney Love talked about her vagina.

Then she'll leave the stage to go be on her mom's late night show and I'll just be stuck watching the band awkwardly trying to ignore what just happened.

Oh man, the monologue is just going to be about how her day went.

Fair enough, but there's a reason why Call of Duty is the most popular of the army-imagination-time-for-grown-ups genre, and also a reason why it irks me a way other games like it don't.

I hadn't heard of it before, but it sounds really interesting. I'll have to check it out some time.