Apparently people still think if they didn't personally witness someone being abused it couldn't have happened. They must also think that harassers wear badges identifying themselves as such.

"... why personal freedom is good and abortion is bad."

Where there is only one set of footsteps, that is when Phyllis carried you.

"opposite of doctor" is right up there on the list of funniest jez lines, along with "human tribal arm band tattoo" to describe adam levine

My boss is giving me a day off tomorrow, which is weird because she hates me. Can I just start driving now and meet you guys at CPAC tomorrow?

I'm having flashbacks to every argument I've had with my "pro-choice Republican" friend of mine. I argue with her that she's not actually pro-choice if she consistently votes for anti-choice candidates—and let's face it, there are NO pro-choice Republicans anymore in legislatures. There used to be, but they've been…

I lost it at that one. That and PRAGNET.

Many of these young gentlemen have these old timey Civil War beards now. Maybe he is preparing to play Rutherford B Hayes.

I feel like whoever has been writing the gossip about Leo as of late has really thrown in the towel. Let's go look at all the celebrities???

Who's the real idiot at E?

Naya Rivera's husband Chester Cheetah

All fetuses should be allowed to carry a concealed handgun to defend themselves against abortion doctors.

Jana. And a Johanna.

And why did they go to "Jinger" before "Joan" or "Julia" or "Jane"

"Yall chill she paid a speeding tick 3 days late in 2013 &license was just suspended recently&she had no idea.It's cleared up It's all good"

2. Kangaroo Jack

I have always found department stores overwhelming. There's too much stuff and somehow none of it is what I'm looking for.

I'm 27, and I realize I only have two "looks":

Official Timepiece of Basic Bitches™

"Nobody upstairs ever talked to me."