1. What the fuck are you talking about? 2. Fuck off.

Which is more likely: that Trump is this brilliant genius who keeps creating all these different distractions to divert us from the thing he wants to do, or that Trump is a senile, sundowning idiot who keeps getting into these messes because he is easily distracted?

Communism isn’t the only thing other than capitalism.

Trump is that kid in high school who constantly told everyone else how big his dick was, but refused to shower during team sports for fear of being found out as a fraud (note: I’m not judging anyone’s genitals here, I’m coming to a point about braggarts); he’s transparently insecure, and tries to fight that insecurity…

Maps, how do they work?

There have been people since at least Ross Perot (but that’s where it begins in my memory) who have run for president saying the government should be run like a business. I always thought that was a terrible idea and Trump shows why. The assistance and support of our allies is worth more than the money they can give…

I’d rather see Angela Merkel just knee him in the balls. 

I would give anything for just one of the G7 leader to just lose it and publicly give Trump the verbal berating that he has deserved for  over the last 40 years.  

I know I mostly just make joke comments but sometimes the only thing that comes to mind is JESUS BUTTCHUGGING CHRIST HOW THE FUCK IS THIS REALITY?! I WILL NEVER EVER FUCKING FORGIVE ANY SINGLE PERSON THAT VOTED FOR THIS INSANE ORANGE BAG OF DIARRHEA WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK?!

This is a good take. (I couldn’t resist the jacket in this one)

I know - it’s rarely, “my constituents don’t want it.” It’s always about how hard it is. 

It’s simple.

Straight from the Democratic Handbook:

I keep asking myself the same fucking question. Why are people so scared of this childish little fucker?

Turtle McFuckface controlling the senate and having no problem whatsoever betraying the constitution and tradition to protect Trump and the GOP, fear that a failed impeachment will cost them in the 2020, obsession with being the “civility” party, fear of setting precedents that will bite them in the ass someday and so…

Has anyone ever met this mythical centrist beast? I sure as Hell haven’t.

Shhhhhh! You might upset and scare the elusive Obama-Trump voters who all hangout in that one Pennsylvania coal country bar the NYT seems to go to.

Bipartisanship! If they are nice to Trump and McConnell, then the centrist Republicans will work across the aisle and get policy that’s good for America passed.

Fear that centrists might decide they’re being too hard on the narcissistic Fuckstick in Chief and lose votes. They’re elected officials. It’s all about getting re-elected to them. Not about doing what’s right.