If the studios bother responding to this at all, it will be to add a tiny “Final film may differ” disclaimer in the corner of trailers.

I have no objection to magical realism per se, it’s just not for me.

Ah, a book I hated reading in junior high is now a Netflix series I’ll completely ignore. The circle is complete.

I mean, he was voted “Most Likely to Die in a Fire” in high school...

I thought Progeria was a pharmaceutical.

Terry Crews?

I mean, he can say he has no real-world talents, but I think it’s safe to say at this point that he’s a pretty talented comic writer and performer.

I know it was a bit, but man, by the time Conan was screaming and chugging hot sauce directly from the bottle, I was actually starting to get a little worried.

I bet somewhere there’s a gymnastics coach named Ella and people call her Coachella as a joke.

The First-ish Omen

*shakes fist* Paxtooooon!

I don’t think there’s any particular reason why the show would need to keep its original premise forever; the whole “Star Trek, but focusing on just low-ranking officers and the shitty jobs they have” thing was a fun premise, but eventually you run the gamut and either start repeating yourself, or stop, or change the…

I think the showrunners are smart enough not to accelerate the characters’ Starfleet careers for the sake of a wish-fulfillment-y “gee wouldn’t it be cool if these incredibly young and still fairly immature officers captained their own ships?”. Although I could see them doing something like having Mariner be inducted…

When did Jay Harrington turn into William Petersen?

Yeah, but it’s one of those country club prisons.

Pam: This is bullshit!

I’m going to charitably assume that small children will find this entertaining, because the trailer does not appeal to me at all.

Well, you have to, if no one wants to be within speaking range of you.

What I don’t understand is what Ray and Dave Davies have to be ashamed of. You really got me there.