I... what?

What, you don’t have a tail?

Han and Lando in the Eeeeempire

I appreciate how brightly-colored and -lit everything was. Aquaman is ridiculous and this is exactly what a live-action Aquaman movie should look like. (I have no illusions that this movie will be good by any traditional metric.)

How dare... wait, I’m confused.

I think the lesson there is, never rely on “promises” like that. Get good lawyers and get ironclad contracts if you’re in that game.

“Wow, you’re some pilot, kid! It’s like you’re walking across the sky!”

I always thought Ashton Kutcher was one of those ‘secretly really good guys’, in that he went to medical school to cure his brother’s undiagnosed illness, and then became a face of combating human trafficking.

Not even if they looked like teen heartthrobs Jonah Hill and Michael Cera?!

Sean, please stop trying to help.

They just meant he suffered 144 separate injuries.

I’m not sure if you meant “fibula” or “tibia.” Maybe both!

To nitpick, it was based on how Rogen and Goldberg interacted when they were teenaged boys a decade prior, but point taken. That said, just because something is accurately reflective of real-world behavior doesn’t mean it’s worth spending time on, and the notion that we’re supposed to find that kind of behavior funny…

inb4 the Onion headline “Dianne Feinstein Found in Area Supermarket Pleading With Customers ‘Do You Know Who I Am?’”

We saw Martin Short in that! At the Pantages, with Jason Alexander as Max Bialystock. Alexander had a great bit at intermission, when he’s in a jail cell, and he’s just sitting there idling while intermission is happening. At one point he started to mimic a conversation between audience members, and goes, “Well, he’s…

I saw Greek in the theater when it came out and remembered it being pretty funny, then started watching it again several years later and realized it had quite a lot of really unpleasant abusive behavior that was supposed to be funny, but didn’t seem so with older eyes.

Look, who among us has not made the minor mistake of committing multiple horrific crimes?

Speaking of 2000s-era grossness:

https://www.theonion.com/topher-grace-comes-out-in-support-of-giving-danny-maste-1850826048

Well, you know, it was the ‘70s.