Dear Lord. The pure, undiluted sleaze involved here absolutely boggles the mind. My thoughts and prayers go out to the judges and legal types in the Fifth Circuit... I cannot imagine the utter horror at looking at a legal document entitled “The National Football League vs. BP.” It had to be like staring into the Ark…

Personally, I would bend over as if in great pain and wail loudly. The danger in this is that someone will compel you to be taken to the hospital in an ambulance, which you’ll likely be billed for. Tread lightly. 

I feel like this needs to be a note attached to every single one of these workplace harassment stories:

In their defense, it did have a girl in it!

If only Everest had a self-checkout line, all these deaths could be avoided.

Reading is hard, but rewarding.

The argument of “only rich people care about their general health, surroundings, and hate vermin!” seems to be inherently flawed.

Using a little algebra we can determine that this statement has also left us with the argument that “poor people don’t mind rats.” As a one time broke person, I would like to inform you that that is not, in fact, the case.

Not sure Christ really cares much about gold medals. He got hung up on some silver, though.

You could always bring your own bath robe and pretend the hotel is fancy. Vacation! Who cares!

Am I the only person who has never stayed at a hotel that gives or lends you a plush bathrobe? Actually, maybe I stayed at one place that did that. Maybe. But it certainly isn’t something I associate with hotel stays. Quick note to travel writers: Most people don’t stay at luxury hotels.

I think it’s the other way around with the G-string on the outside.

+1 Asking the important questions. Seriously, I was like “What the hell does she [not] have on?” I had only an informational, non-prurient interest, of course.

What is she wearing? Nylon, sheer biker shorts over a g-string?

Rangers fan here. Had I heard of Kaapo Kakko two months ago? No. Does that change the fact that he’s now my favorite dude ever and I’m now looking forward to someday having twins who we name Kaapo and Kakko? Not at all.

FFP was instituted to stop clubs like Atletico, Napoli, PSG, Chelsea, Benfica, Dortmund, Leeds, Fiorentina, Lazio, Roma, Parma etc. from going bankrupt, which all either did or nearly did. It has nothing to do with protecting “old-class rich clubs”.

Good. Maybe we can focus on the actually fun and good game of tennis instead of the tantrums of a man that has the same number of Grand Slam wins as Tim Burgdorf, who is a person that I just made up for illustrative purposes.

WIFE: Do you want the windows open?
ME: Nah, I’m fine.
WIFE: Okay I’ll open the windows a little.

Any discipline they may have received has been kept under wraps, although the investigating officer recommended “non-punitive letters of instruction.”