We use the word 'hate' to freely in this country. I hate racists and snow peas. Both make me want to vomit. Both elicit a strong reaction out of me. To say that you hate a fine recording artist who happens to be a poor singer serves nothing more than to diminish the word 'hate'.

Oh great. Now she's gotta free pass to be all slutty and stuff. I'll be at the zoo tomorrw with my protest signs.

Fat Bastard haz a sad.

It's hard to feel strongly either way about these competitions. They are massively subjective and place value on some rather silly things.

Joan Rivers is what happens when you feed Betty White after midnight.

I walked into the bathroom the other day. My six year old was sitting on the toilet droppine a deuce. She said, "Daddy when I push, my eyes get watery." I said, "Don't push. More importanly, lock the door."

Your point is valid. Men will not admit to pain. I had a bone reset in my hand. I was determined not to show any signs of pain. The doc pushed on my hands. Everything went black. When I came to I had a cast on my hand and all this strange moisture streaming from my eyes.

Awesome! I love Billy Joel.

Pump the brakes, Crabby. I think this is intended to be a joke. I'm pretty sure Wilford doesn't refer to his condition as the 'beetus.

And this is the dude I'll most likely wind up having to follow on 'Bring Your Dad to School' Day.

My wife has the same issue. So putting the moves on her comes with the added guilt that she will have a shitty night's sleep.

When I read the headline, my eyes became large and the light that they shined can't be seen. I mean, I always compared their relationship to a kiss from the rose on the grey. Sad really.

It's like the spawn of the first mating between a lambo and a Range Rover.

What's that, Tracie? I can't hear you from under my ultra-fashionable bomber hat. Now where are my Uggs?

My urn will say, "His legend burned out long before his grease fire ever did."

I knew I didn't like her 25 seconds into this contrived pos.

Tumbleweed is often mistaken for Nevada's (my home state) flower: Sagebrush.

Now the healing can begin.

Here is what 24 hours of diapers looks like.

Whenever I hear that accent, I think of "A Perfect Storm".