I don’t have much hope for otherwise, but the other recent successes do keep me at least a little hopeful. So we’ll see what happens, but I won’t be shocked if he wins.

You have obviously not ever been to Alabama, much less lived here. I live in Birmingham. Doug Jones has plenty of support. There are a lot of moderate Republicans crossing over to vote Democrat, many of them for the first time in their lives. HOWEVER, Alabama has spent the last 50 or so years vilifying Democrats…

I don’t wear rompers (I look like a fat baby in need of a diaper change), but I would wear the shit outta that gold sequin number. Like, every day to work, just stomp in and say “try me, motherfuckers”

I’m in love with Kelly Rowland’s look. She needs some black fluffy stuff on the front of her heels and a martini in her hand, and she becomes peak 70s, and I love it.

And, just since we’re sharing, I would do terrible things for the opportunity to explore a crystal warehouse in Culver City with Kim Kardashian.

I am so fucking HERE FOR THIS!!!!!!

Holy Shit. It did not disappoint.

Ok, I can’t find the actual text of that one...any chance you know where it’s hiding? I’m at work so I can’t watch the video :(

While this bowl is good in theory, I’ve got three jackasses dogs that grab a mouth full of food, toss that mouthful on the floor, and then pick out the bits they want. All 3 of them. My floor is always covered in dog food. My dogs are jerks.

While this bowl is good in theory, I’ve got three jackasses dogs that grab a mouth full of food, toss that mouthful…

I just started playing Shadows of Mordor again...I forgot how much fun it is to just run around and murder a bunch of Orcs. Very great for getting out your job-related aggression.

It is the dismissive apathy that disregards the freedom and equality of people. It is the repeated placing of white discomfort over bloody black pain.

I mean, in Luther Strange’s campaign ad he’s shooting a gun at a target with Barack Obama’s name on it, so I’m pretty sure we’re almost there...

That’s it exactly—gotta remind people we’re a Christian nation and protect Jesus from all the sinners and heathens destroying the world. And Alabama will be the last bastion of defenders.

This is what I don’t get: If my middle and high schools that I went to 10-15 years ago IN FREAKING ALABAMA can grasp that you don’t have to stand, why can’t all these other fuckers???

Seriously how the fuck did angels lose????? We’re talking like literal WRATH OF THE LORD with crazy power vibes. Not your delicate cherub, but a seraphim with 9 pairs of wings and FURY. Come oooooooon :(

Reading this today, I came across like a total asshole to you...I was pretty irritated with thefirstJaneDelly so I apologize for the mean tone!

Dude, flag it and move on. Whoever this person is is commenting on pretty much every fucking comment praising this...it’s bullshit and they can go fuck themselves.

I fucking love this entire thing. Thank you for doing the Lord’s work, Madeleine.

I can’t stand Tamra, but I gotta agree...that tag is perfect for her. Vicki’s is always cringeworthy :/

Seriously, your advice is the best, and I feel like when I started reading your stuff as a young 20-something that I’ve basically become a real adult partially thanks to you. I’m pretty excited for this new column!