ok but like where does Paleo Douche fall into that chart?

I’ve taken to just eating what ever bugs are within arms reach and fistfuls of my own hair.

He was one of the good ones? Even if he had a record as long as my arm he STILL shouldn’t have been shot!

Despite his comments about at least two of his daughters (Tiffany here, the comments about Ivanka saying “If she weren’t my daughter...”), I actually don’t think he wants to have sex with his own children. Rather, I think he believes that the highest compliment you can give a woman is to call her fuckable. Which leads…

I’m thinking Rob Chyna just as a “fuck y’all”

OMG I FORGOT ABOUT THE POSSIBILITY OF AMBER ROSE AS A MAID OF HONOR.

I look back at being 20 years old and in REAL love for the first time... Man, I did some crazy shit when we broke up. I couldn’t handle it. I didn’t sleep... I couldn’t eat... I was texting (T9ing on my Razr like CRAZY) and crying. Showing up at his parents and crying. Hanging out with friends of his friends just to…

MADONNA, I WILL HUNT YOU DOWN AND KILL YOU. STAY AWAY FROM MY MAN.

I love this comment so much.

This lady is the same age as I am. She looks older. The first clue that she was not black is that she had started to crack. Come on people!

Drake is the Drake of the Drake.

Signed,
Drake.

somewhere in the corner of the internet where they celebrate white history month, i imagine

I am rugged and handsome yet tortured and homeless, and if you wait long enough I will become somebodies love interest. Because I was Peter on Heroes.

I can only sleep on a bed made of whipped cream, so I get it.

Nick Offerman is my spirit animal.

Accepts women’s explanations without challenge.

36. Is nice to your mom. Like, brings her a potted plant or some shit like that.