That's fine and dandy, but my toddlers were more delicious than chicken.

Since I have read almost all of the Jack Reacher books and Jack Reacher was a military cop, I'm kind of an expert on situations like these. The men were arrested but never formally charged and will be held against their will for up to a week while Reacher investigates and kills everyone. He'll also sleep with the…

I think that whole meth teeth thing is bullshit. I've been drinking Diet Dr. Pepper for 20 years and my teeth are fine. Both of them.

When I worked there, a co-worker of mine accidentally entered the graveyard scene from outside. He said the door closed behind him and he couldn't find the handle and people were staring at him so he started pounding on the wall and we let him out.

This post made me horny.

So...Bill Belichick had a press conference?

In all seriousness, combined with the lack of sex education in many public schools, this is going to create some fantastically strange answers to the, "Where do babies come from," question.

Did you notice that I made sure to mention that I got off the freeway well before Rockford?

This is worthy of outrage.

Jezebel: Finding outrage in stupid shit since...since...whenever they started.

Cause and effect, motherfucker!

Are you kidding? I always wear a bejeweled catcher's mask and feathers. Always.

A lot less of this would happen if retailers (especially Apple) would learn the magic of saying, "I'm sorry."

On I-90 in Illinois going west toward Rockford, a tuned car (I say this because with the aftermarket body panels and ground effects I could not tell what it was...maybe a Toyota?) was right on my ass even though I was doing 85 and the speed limit was 55 (this is just normal Illinois driving as ALL of the traffic was…

I don't know why, but I don't like when a writer shares what they're about to do. I never hear of songwriters saying, "I'm going to write a rock song with a heavy beat and in a 5/4 signature so it's impossible to dance to."

Fat, smoking, alcoholic, pregnant women who eat cheese. The scourge of America.

That was great. And she can really do the crazy. I mean, there were parts where she scared me (2:28 - 2:39).

9:03 AM EST and ESPN still has no mention of this on their site.

Scenario 10: You just read an article by a woman who looks to be attractive from her tagline photo. You don't have her phone number and who knows if she ever reads her gawker e-mail?