Jeez, didn’t you read the story? He was a former football player who once played football but no longer played football, and was well liked by the people who liked him! And those rapes he committed but maybe he didn’t? You weren’t there so who knows?

A) the alpha/beta divide doesn’t actually exist in nature, only in captivity; in the wild, animal groups are almost entirely familial.

B) The exception being lions, which doesn’t really square up in any case since humans aren’t felines.

C) the only primate species with an dominant male/harem social structure are…

Virginity itself is not a measure of anything, but you sound like a guy that observes and judges The Female from afar, and comes up with all sorts of fun generalizations about the species. And no, I don’t care if it’s a trilby or a fedora.

So what are you going to do, then? Give up all hope of ever having a relationship for the rest of your life? Or drive any woman who would be interested in you away by doubting everything she says and questioning her actions?

Maybe all females cheat on HIM.

Someone was emotionally stunted as a child.

Referring to women as “females” definitely helps your credibility here...

Nobody deserves to be abused.

i heard from andsmokeit that he’s a robot

“Hold it together Dan. Nobody knows you’re tripping balls. Just a little while longer. How long has it been? 20 minutes!? Fuck! Hold it together Dan."

one is a robotttttttttt

Wait a minute, god and baby jesus and the talking walnut said they couldn’t even do mouth stuff? Or hand stuff? That’s turrible.

robot

clever of the NFL to use a gay rumor to cover up that he is a robot

WHY DID I HAVE TO SCROLL SO FAR DOWN BEFORE I HIT THIS REFERENCE?!?!?

Eric and Kathy, just two wacky folks being wacky!!! Just look at the billboards!!

Now to persuade Jim Tomsula to move out of the big suitcase.