you cant disprove it

jim webb killed lincoln chafees dad

I used to comment regularly on Jezebel for years (under a different name) and stopped because of the feeling the author describes when someone she assumed would be an ally made her feel unwelcome.

Well, based on the UN projections and scientist models that I’ve read, it’s not good. Predicted PS4 tray melt, Xbox One dryness, and possible game rationing. Of course you won’t see anyone talking about that at the debates!

Wait, you don’t write for a tech blog? Then how come I keep putting egg yolks, butter, and lemon juice into my DVD drive to make hollandaise sauce?

Please explain “the current gaming climate” in a way that will make me feel great about the fact that I brought home two Xbox Ones in less than 24 hours and neither one of them was able to be used as a game console.

I don’t write for a tech blog. What the fuck are you talking about?

Bacon is okay but too often when eating out it’s soft, floppy shit or thick, flavorless applewood. The adoration for it approaches zealotry bordering on the absurd. I want crisp, salty bacon and there are very few places outside of the home that I can get that.

YOUR HAPPINESS IS IRRELEVANT ALBERT! YOU MUST WRITE PIECES IN EXACTLY THE WAY I LIKE OR I WILL CONTINUE TO BITCH ANONYMOUSLY!

I want Albert to do video game and system reviews forever, and to have defensive gamers come on here and entirely miss the point in perpetuity. Can this be a regular thing?

Hey Albert have you considered just being a whiny internet nerd instead of a (two-time certified) sex-haver? Because then this stuff wouldn’t bother you, apparently.

Some solid Kotaku Kinja today. All comments below fall into these categories:

“I’ve already angered comic book nerds, sports parents, and Republicans. Maybe I’ll go piss in Kotaku’s cereal.”

Here’s a selection of Albert Burneko takes, in headline form (culled from non-NBA/Dad/food prep posts)

Don’t sweat the difficulties, Albert. If we know one thing about gamers, it’s that they’re not particularly hypersensitive to any sort of direct or even indirect criticism about their hobby.

...a disappointingly large number of men still don’t know what to do with a clitoris when they come across one.

Funny timing of post. I warmed up my wife last night, which turned into “don’t stop”. No toys, no penetration, nada. Just a few fingers on the hot button. She came once, then had a monstrous orgasm the second time. I then got oral till I finished, followed by a neck and back massage until I fell asleep.

Well, someone needs to bankroll a 1 million year research project because that, sir, is a subject that has way too many variables.

Fitting, seeing as the Rockies often can't get to first.