Heh, I want a home doggy daycare. That would so be me.

How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?

Nonono, they’re lazy browns. Give them guns, it’s entertaining.

I agree with the first part of what you said. Kids are more resiliant than adults think. I hated asking questions when I was young and getting “you’ll understand when you’re older”. Fuckers I want to know NOW. This is a great opportunity to teach kids about other people, conflict and how to help.

Industrial engineering: The wussiest of all engineers. Boohiss.

#bossbitch

If I had seen you in that store, I would have been on the floor laughing.

Glad we could come to an accord. You do the noogies, I do the cakies. :P

I will bake you whatever kind of cake you want. My crowning glory is the rainbow cake that is my picture. I can fucking do anything. Except fondant. Because that shit is nasty.

So, when do you know that you’re “white enough” to be their version of white?

Yeah I really don’t get this either. Like...what? Dude, you need, like, a puppy or something.

I will bake you a large cake if you do this.

This is the only correct response to Northern Mexicans.

..this is how it always is for me?

Satan is #teamcake. Satan is also #teamgayburrito

This is a small-town thing. Like, the shove things down, always be happy and don’t rock the boat? It’s prevalent in the midwest because of farms. People don’t move very far away, don’t ever reach beyond what they’re taught, etc. It’s sad. It’s also why a lot of us are bigger people-we eat our emotions.

God. Duh..

Omg...how do you know this? This is awful. Don’t you need at least 6 weeks to recover from giving birth?

Well, at least it wouldn’t be anything too rough or something she might have enjoyed at one point. Basically, she can lay there and...accept it.

This was my old insurance, an HMO. Now I have another insurance through my fiance’s work (we get options to change who covers us so I WILL be changing) and it’s pretty much non existent. My first pair of glasses was about $200. This most recent pair was $400. Wheeeee!