Oh god, that explains it. I just assumed he was an immigrant because you said he was Puerto Rican, but I've never really heard of any immigrants behaving like that so this makes way more sense. Florida Man comes in all varieties of shitheel.

Shoddy work? Have you listened to Car Seat Headrest? The fact that you referred to it as a ripoff tells me you haven't.

I feel like beating up a gay dude for being a douchebag is weirdly kind of progressive. Straight dudes used to have a monopoly on the whole douche thing, but now we've got Andy Cohen and Anderson Cooper.

This is also the problem I have with Clifford the Big Red Dog.

I retract my snark. I just assumed that because I hated these books as a kid, everybody did. I may not be checking this movie out, but I respect the enthusiasm.

the Looking parody Not Looking

To be Puerto Rican, that guy sounds American as fuck.

AND MY HEADSTONE ONLY HAS MINIMAL TYPOS

Well, that's good. For his wife's sake, I hope Cruz is at least smart enough not to endorse the guy who humiliated her.

Sad upvote for accuracy .

I don't believe this is an Amy Schumer sketch. Not enough talk about vaginas doing vagina stuff and vaginaing vaginally.

Trump's is more of a "Nein! Nein! Nein!" plan.

I ferreted your mom right in the ferreting beaver.

Upvoted not for agreement but for the fact that it amused me.

The Internet: I love all my pop culture websites equally.

Comment of the day.

I got a Feces notification for this?

Seriously, what the fuck is with these dorky-ass headlines?

My Dane Cook just reads from a list of Louis CK jokes.

That guy is one fedora away from being the most Gamergate a person can be.