Jesus Christ. One tiny upshot to this whole national embarrassment is that I now know, without a doubt, that I am not nearly as socially awkward and embarrassing as I thought I was.

Hello. I’m not American. Can someone tell me why America thought it was a good idea to make a functionally illiterate man with severe personality disorders the President of the United States of America?

So we’re supposed to, collectively, resolve not to criticize people who were willing to vote against their interests for a dangerously unqualified and unstable presidential candidate purely out of spite for some vaguely defined class of elites, in the hopes that, if we’re nicer to these people, they’ll realize the…

When he (in kayfabe) bought Monday Night Raw from Vince McMahon, he (again, in kayfabe) sold it back like two weeks later when (in reality!!!) the company’s stock tanked because of it and he was gone again. Yet again, the real world could learn a lot from pro wrestling.

Since when do they read Jezebel?

No those people need to be reminded repeatedly and loudly that they fucked up bigly and are fucking morons and we all hate them.

Fuck them. They did a stupid thing and should be made to feel stupid.

It would be the first time he’s made money!

Being forced to watch the White House orientation video must have been tough for him, since it doesn’t mention him. The part about sexual harassment in the workplace must have been uncomfortable.

You need to read ‘The Art of the Deal’ (or not, lol). You don’t start high. He’s broke I’d imagine, or at least doesn’t have much liquid assets. Thus, you start at say 50 million in cash (if not lower). He’d take it in a New York minute, no need to waste the other 1.95 billion.

One time, I forgot about a presentation I had in fourth grade. I didn’t research or read anything. Totally forgot about it for weeks. I did my best to wing it, but I only fooled the other idiot kids in the room, not my teacher. Every time Trump speaks, I hear that presentation.

They don’t have enough Republicans on board to override a veto.

Wolf will veto it.

Also more stores removing Ivankas merchandise, hooooraaayyyy we can now shop like a normal people

I think he likes to talk tough to compensate for the fact he’s terrified of stairs.

Right, a letter that was, in fact, written for. a. Sessions. Senate. confirmation.

Invoking rule 19 is completely insane for a confirmation hearing. But even putting that aside for a second, how is reading a letter from Coretta Scott King impugning his character? Like, how?

This is obviously horrible. But I doubt it will have any effect. The republicans don’t even need to pretend to care anymore, optics be damned. I mean they showed us who they are a million times and their asses still got re-elected.