See this is why you need to be like Kate Hudson. Star in one really great movie at the start of your career do shit for the rest of it and hook up with an athlete who can’t do it in the playoffs. So Oliva sorry but you have to hook up with the Red Ryder BB Gun.

The mom of a severely ill child doesn’t have time for the BS.

I have to call you out on the Smirnoff diss. After reading a blind taste test study by the NYT a few years ago, in which leading vodka experts sampled all of the major vodkas, the consensus winner was Smirnoff. I ask for it by name now, and frequently get snooty looks when doing so.

I just can’t get over the fact that she turned down meeting a make a wish kid a few years back.

“Russell Wilson just can’t seal the deal refuses to seal the deal for religious reasons, which is fine, even if we’ll give him shit about it because have you SEEN Ciara?”

Of course Eli has trouble finishing.

“Join the club”

No. We want that 47$ tax savings that we job creators can use to supercharge the Walker Economic Boom.

We can’t discount the possibility that Odem is simply trying to wait the Kardashians out.

“Lamar, Kobe’s here to see you.”

Honestly, if I had an injury that could reasonably lead to some amnesia, I’ll consider using it as an opportunity to at least act like I no longer know certain people, even if I still did.

You know you fucked up when Philadelphia has the moral high ground

This Clippers team is the only franchise that could get less likable after losing Sterling.

On one hand, this is an egregiously bad call. On the other hand, fuck the Clippers.

Perspective. Bradley lost to Algieri.

And at some point today, he’ll be at a Bills game and one of those fingers will be in someone’s ass.

ESPN and boxing.

That little pep talk was pathetic. If somebody wants to deem it noteworthy, it just proves that this world needs to be obliterated.

Is it any surprise that Mike Tyson has a speech impediment after being trained by Atlas and Kevin Rooney?

This explains Teddy’s continued fundraising efforts on behalf of the Huckabee campaign