Me, neither. I feel left out. I'm lazy when it comes to going to get it.

You are the best. Three times a week, you say? That's dedication. (I died at gross teenager sex, too. )

Like, ever.

It sounded terrifying. I gagged at the naked-sitting-in-cat-puke part.

Maybe the next pissing contest should be Worst Step-mom stories.

Ho-ly shit. But you know what they say, bad wedding, great marriage. Glad you guys are still together.

They yammered on about being doctors. That was the dead giveaway. PS. I'm Indian, I can say it. ; )

I'm Indian and the seconds Sunnyside Lady said they were going on about being doctors, I thought: "I'll bet a gazillion bucks they're Indian." Have never heard of the power point thing, though.

I kinda want to know what the feud was about.

I respectfully disagree. I think the Nazi photo slide show is up there in the "most horrifying aspect of this wedding" competition.

Dammit, I misread. She put the cheese in the purse. I was picturing her cramming it into her cleavage or something.

Um...Whut? Girlfriend? Whut?

Also, your closers of "get fucked buddy" and "breakfast was good" made me roll around laughing.

Holy Christ, that sound horrible. However, I would like to compliment Ilene for having the quick reflexes/thinking to crack Mountain Giant Al in the head with the pan.

I want to know how she got it in the jumpsuit and are there photos of it?

That sounds like the BEST wedding ever!

That sounds amazing. No wait...

WHAT the everlovin' hell kind of person shoots up at a WEDDING?? Wait, I answered my own question. The type that swings at a wedding at 2pm on a Sunday. Jebus...

I feel you. I'm having my wedding at my BF's sister's house. There will be a grand total of ten people there. I would go to City Hall, register, and go home and go to bed, but the ol' man wants a real wedding, so I gave in. I like weddings and all but I really couldn't care less if I have one.

Srsly. D-Day was less of a precision assault than this dumb wedding.