ehem, 3 digits, not 4. San Diego fans, amirite?

1999? None of those players was even in the NFL yet.

Blah blah blah Padres blah blah blah nothing short of embarrassing. Business as usual. At least we managed to pay Melvin $15 million to go away in his first good season in forever.

I think they actually confused him with C. Montgomery Burns.

Because the worst punishment is having to compete at the Rio games? Sure, possible.

IOC decides against dying of polonium 210 poisoning.

Gary Anderson tried to catch a flight to say goodbye, but he missed it.

“I’ve got just the boat!”

What? What?

Forgot one record: Largest golf payout for Sweden since Elin’s divorce settlement.

Fact: Upon returning from an away match, the club is always greeted by Sir Sean Connery. He says one thing, and one thing only: Welcome...to the Rock.

If the Earth were round, Giancarlo Stanton’s dingers would go straight into outer space. Think about it, you guys.

No way that’s Jeter’s lineup. It’s got the actress with the most range at short.

Maños - The Horns Of Fate

I’m 99% sure you can’t kick a soccer ball that far, even on the roll.

“Anything I know nothing about I assume is very easy.”

Clearly I’m wrong - it’s been a while since I kicked a soccer ball, and I’ll defer to the mass opinion that this is very difficult. I’ll try it when I get a chance - my sister still plays and I’m seeing her next week. I’ll take a stab at it and let you know how it goes.

+1 Ex-Prime Minister

That 0.02% is close to the 0.05% of people worldwide that have alzheimers. My guess is the 650 were old people that went to bed, or just forgot.

The .2% not watching were busy shifting accounts and investments at Mossack Fonseca.