Listen, chickie! I’m turning 60 soon, so you are hereby declared ‘A young chick’ on yer birthday. Celebrate youth! Dammit...

When you are unattractive and overweight, it never happens. I am ugly, invisible, unwanted and dismissed. So I guess i have nothing to compare it to.

He hasn’t even begun to pay his dues. Imagine Never to see green grass again. Never to have a friend, someone who would be made to suffer a thousand days alone. Lock him up and never look at him ever again.

Don’t kill him, he wants to be a martyr! No Virgins for you, jerk-wad!

Superman can be such a dick...

Have you read ‘Freakanomics’? Fun!

A whole bucket of YES! I love vintage cars. I wish I had done this. Congrats!!! Just awesome!

All of MY hummus is vegan, free-ranged, locally-sourced, organic gluten-free and hand-made by science majors from MIT. So, Nyah! Nyah!

I lick butter-cows at the state fair. Because free butter.

Also, Northern Michigan is stunningly beautiful during spring, summer And fall. Breathtaking Great Lakes views, forests and historic forts.

You want to know what be perfect for you? An Alaskan cruise. It's beautiful! The mountains are so beautiful. You can debark to go salmon fishing and a chef will prepare your catch. Go during the summer, of course.

The gay couple across the street made my cat vomit in my shoe and also killed my cactus. But damn if their little boy isn't the cutest and happiest kid on the planet!

Wrigley is a pee-pee soaked Heck Hole? One can only imagine the fine scent of piss, stale beer and bunless hot-dog odors floating through the air. Amazing.... I just threw up in my granny purse a little.

How about canned salmon? It’s Salmon, for god sake. Shitty, awful canned salmon. But it’s cheap and very nutritious. I hated it but it’s all we had sometimes. Mom knew how to make it tolerable —to this day I won’t eat salmon patties. I prefer tuna salad.

This is proof that this dumbass has never been helped out with food stamps. It is NOT EASY AT ALL. Beans, cereal, milk, is good. But try to afford Fresh veggies, fruits and stretch that dollar to last all month. It’s a challenge and it is very hard. So this precious jerk needs schooling and fast. But as we have…

As an atheist, I would bake a cake for anyone. And I can keep my snark to myself because I love earning a living. If you wish to believe in the Flying Spaghetti Monster I would bake you a delicious taste treat. Want Jesus riding a dinosaur? It’s yours! Want Satan cuddling puppies? Yup. What ever you want. How about…

My hero Michelle giving the stink-eye to Pence.

I have relatives in northern Indiana. I am also an atheist. And of course the new law could effect me too. I guess I just will have to wear my "Nobody Knows I'm An Atheist" t-shirt. Come at me, y'all!

How did I just turn 59? Will the world explode when I turn 60? By the way, I rock my grey hair. I earned every one of them!!!