Thank you. I don't think I've ever spoken to anyone into basketball even a little bit who doesn't love or at least have the utmost respect for Dirk. Maybe everyone doesn't think he's "cool" like a D-Wade or a Carmelo Anthony type, but, you know, he's not. Doesn't mean he isn't almost universally loved, feared and…

+1 glass of freshly made lemonade

Abort. Not funny.

...So I make it through the foyer and there's this smokin' hot blonde with long legs, huge boobs and a thick, round, perfect ass (let's just call her Stephanie). She's totally digging me, so we decide to head into the living room and get to know each other better. I don't know what happened, but within like 3 seconds…

Why TV People Think You're An Idiot

Things got awkward when it came time in the set for "Jailhouse Rock."

+1

Not Pictured: Guy in a Dolphins helmet waving a dictionary at Kathie Lee.

NAME: Candy Deepthroat

Ha! Damn, that's too good to be stuck here in the replies. +1

And from the fifth round to the twelfth round, I was in your ass and you was ready to quit and you was blowing and puffing and went to your corner like a ragdoll

I haven't seen that much crack in the WAFL since Antoine Walker took my IHOP order last night.

And yet, many Red Sox fans are still disappointed that Yo Gabba Gabba is not, in fact, a racial slur.

As much as he likes the Camaro, he'd realistically have settled for anything but a Lancer.

Whitehead is so excited about that car, I think he's going to burst.

There was a pornographic magazine photo laying a few feet from the goat.

Jump on in! Sadly, I'm hardly ever here anymore these days, so you'll probably stay afloat longer anyway.

Nice.

Losing my shit. +1

I was holding out for a bit in hopes that Drew might do it himself, since that's his legendary shtick there anyway, plus I feel like I see him in the comments more than most writers. Glad if mine worked though.