UConn claims they sought and considered Burton's advice, but decided to go in a different direction.

The Dykstra bench is bed, and possibly repossessed.

@dont-forget-where-you-came-from-cheese mac: Damn. What's up Huffington Post! Welcome back! Also +1

@taco_mailman: And in the course of one particularly drunken and ill advised tryst with Liza Minelli, it's said that one flew over the cuckoo's nest.

And yet no matter how much I write to the NBA, they refuse to do anything about Jack Nicholson's ball placement during Lakers telecasts.

You'd be boring too if you had to answer those questions every day.

The paper's Monthly Diddy column, however, will continue to be hosted by whoever shows up with the most intimidating bodyguards.

@Sheed's Bald Spot: WE MUST PROTECT THIS HOUSE!!!!

@FavreFAIL: Just read yours. Awesome.

Quite conveniently, Griffin uses the same tattoo artist who did Tracy McGrady's "Cripple 4 Life" tattoo.

"don't Brett Favre us."

@Phintastic: Sorry, I live in NYC and haven't driven for years. I forget how strange a statement like that may look.

Don't you think maybe, just maybe, those who had been really throwing them back would've been a little hesitant to voluntarily blow into a breathalyzer after a game or, you know, ever?

Finally, network execs figure out what the people want.

the last of my roadblocks with Nikki have been removed.

Fuck you. It's dry ENOUGH, god dammit.

@dont-forget-where-you-came-from-cheese mac: Holy shit. +1

"Wait, those things have an 'ON' button?"

@Tulos_Mullet: Yep, and the kids get discounted admission to the new Dick Cheney's Fun House in the food court!