@Tulos_Mullet: Shit, I need to finish that.

@Armen Tamzarian: I really hope it's a fatass lazy blob of a cat and is named Lucifuge.

@tastes_like_burning: I loathe them personally, but I was thinking you might say the same of Metallica. Then I realized it's inapplicable because everyone at Metallica shows nowadays is "that guy."

Goddamn. Complaining about the spin on FOX News is like joking about airline food, but not having watched any of it in a while, this is just infuriating.

Woman In Sex Tape That May Not Exist

@OchentaYcinco: Nice.

I'm not sure I followed the whole story here, but Forest Whitaker looks PISSED.

sanchez looks JUST LIKE RUSSEL !

@Let-Us-Milk-This-Cow: Someday, even johnnyballgame's friend will appreciate the beauty of a Kinky Afro.

I only hope our new GM and Manager will have eminently pun-friendly names for the Post and Daily News. Ultimately that's the best we can realistically hope for.

@TheGreenMiles: Well then forgive me. I'm not trying to win anyone over though. The way you worded your comment made it look like you were implying that eating meat and wearing mink coats were somehow essential to "survival." That would be a ridiculous statement that I felt compelled to address. If that's not what you…

Damn Deadspin, is that how you play it, dawg? Puttin' the ho post before the bro post?

Not surprisingly, Simmons has much harsher words for anyone who harms a wolf in its adolescent years.

@TheGreenMiles: Do you see the difference between "survival" and "because I just really like veal and burgers more than vegetables and legumes, which easily provide all the same nutrients and are much cheaper to prepare?"

I can't wait until Karen gets over the initial shock of having pissed off everyone she knows and realizes she can totally bank on this if she'd get off her high horse for a second. I'm pretty confident we'll be seeing Karen Owens' name on Deadspin again not long after the public interest in this little bit of…

@WhoDoYouKnowHere: +1 good time

a revenge sabotage plot by Jordan

I look forward to the special report on Duke athletics.

@Bellwether Johnson: +1 Gravel Pit

The Ninja Turtles and Vanilla Ice have a similar parade planned, but the details are a secret.