“Man who looks like giant baby causes brewers to sound like giant babies.”

If Star Trek has taught me anything*, it’s a clear indicator that someone comes from an evil mirror universe.

The GIF sadly cuts off right after it strikes the umpire- I need another second to see if it rebounds back to hit Wieters a second time, improving on the three-impact pitch from the other day. Based on its trajectory off of Wendelstedt’s mask, it seems likely.

Warren Harding won the greatest popular vote victory since the evolution of the two-party system by yelling at the people on his lawn.

“There is a tragic flaw in our precious constitution, and I don’t know what can be done to fix it. This is it: Only nut cases want to be president.” -Kurt Vonnegut

“88" and “14" are numbers you commonly see tattooed on the necks of some very fine people nazi shitbirds. “88" is for “HH” is for ‘Heil Hitler’. The “14" is for some fourteen word phrase, to effect of “We must secure a future for the white race not gonna look this up.”

I really, Really, REALLY hate buying The Thing and then discovering it’s infected all of my other DVD’s and replaced them with facsimiles of itself.

Two all-time favorite reveals, from Michael Caine:

I think he’s just missing some punctuation- she should bench herself from writing ‘never’ again. This won’t affect her writing too much unless she has pieces in the works about unlicensed Sean Connery Bond films, or possibly the works of Edgar Allen Poe, tenuously connected to the NFL via the Baltimore Ravens.

Fuck yeah Janelle Monae Flash.

The Vice Presidential Action Rangers, tasked with protecting the space-time continuum, run in to trouble whenever murder doesn’t work, as it’s all they’re good at.

Oh man, teenagers are generally obnoxious little shits. I’m not a violent person, but I could probably find it in myself to beat the pulp out of Teenage Hitler.

“What if we just reshoot it with Nic Cage?” -Ethan Hawke

It occurred to me the other day that all of Chewbacca 's rage outbursts in the original trilogy are likely a sign of PTSD now that he's established as a veteran of the Clone Wars, and I regret past instances in which I made light of his violent tendencies.

I suppose it can be if you're referring to the soap opera.

Yes, but if you put a clothespin around the snake it will use less electricity.

That is her crime, it is also her punishment.

Bah, I already felt bad enough when Calvin Johnson (a day older and an inch taller) retired with $70 million while I was still in grad school.

Twinsies! There’s a good gap of about seven months between my birthday and King Felix, so I guess he would be the one for most 32-year-olds.

I like the line in Vampire Weekend’s “Diane Young” about ‘you’ve got the luck of a Kennedy’, for its dual-edged implication of the good luck of being born into wealth and power, but also the bad luck that seemed to follow with it.