the only thing i care about in football is when the winning team lines up to gently kiss the tip of the president’s penis and receive a championship muffin

Seriously. Let me guess, his linkedin espouses paradigm shifting and venture capitalist funding.

Not nearly as overrated as your player evaluation skills.

I banged a guy who’s very high up in the RNC. I’m almost tempted to reach out to him and see what info I can get out of him. I’ve been ignoring him for a couple years though so it might not work. Plus I’m married to someone else now.

Why is this on my car blog?!?!?

Oh I don’t know about that. Rumor has it LBJ was quite large...if you know what I mean.

Anyone know a good prison rape joke so I can show solidarity with victims of child sexual assault?

Buddy was just following his coach’s admonition to not back down against Sac.

Best part: DeMarcus yelling, “He hit me in my nuts!”

Well, now, hold on. Did he go to school in the south? They teach you it’s okay to touch cousins like that.

Nice interview, Hannah. One question, though: why are your boots so small?

This is completely amazing. Please, continue.

His qualifications are impressive, though. For example, he’s not al-Baghdadi.

Corporate branding finally comes to the NBA? Now how am I supposed to enjoy the NBA on ESPN presented by Kia with these small patches on the jerseys?

I was first!!!!1!

Brooklyn is infor another shitty season.

Nothing says “GRIT CULTURE” like a boozy brunch with your friends and a few coworkers you felt obligated to invite at this crazy cool Peruvian Place its like not very well known but sooooo authentic seriously you have to try it.

The Brooklyn Nets: Infor an ass-whuppin’.