the only thing i care about in football is when the winning team lines up to gently kiss the tip of the president’s penis and receive a championship muffin

Seriously. Let me guess, his linkedin espouses paradigm shifting and venture capitalist funding.

Not nearly as overrated as your player evaluation skills.

I banged a guy who’s very high up in the RNC. I’m almost tempted to reach out to him and see what info I can get out of him. I’ve been ignoring him for a couple years though so it might not work. Plus I’m married to someone else now.

Every time I read a troll comment like you, I’m reminded of a bit of Neal Stephenson’s Snow Crash.

Why is this on my car blog?!?!?

Oh I don’t know about that. Rumor has it LBJ was quite large...if you know what I mean.

Anyone know a good prison rape joke so I can show solidarity with victims of child sexual assault?

Buddy was just following his coach’s admonition to not back down against Sac.

Best part: DeMarcus yelling, “He hit me in my nuts!”

Well, now, hold on. Did he go to school in the south? They teach you it’s okay to touch cousins like that.

Nice interview, Hannah. One question, though: why are your boots so small?

This is completely amazing. Please, continue.

His qualifications are impressive, though. For example, he’s not al-Baghdadi.

Can you imagine the uproar if white people were enslaved for hundreds of years, and after having been freed were still denied basic rights for another century, and then were denied the tools that would allow them to better their overall circumstance like decent education and access to housing and banking, and then…

I was first!!!!1!

Brooklyn is infor another shitty season.

The Brooklyn Nets: Infor an ass-whuppin’.