Omg, guys. We are living in an episode of the Apprentice, aren’t we?

Unfortunately, this dog is being investigated for ties to snakes on a plane.

Maybe watersports.

What pisses me off most about jagoffs like this guy...

That’s a pretty stark correlation.

Secret loooovers...that’s what they are...

Just to head this off at the pass; no, it’s still racist if you’re going to come into the comments to say something along the lines of “You know I normally wouldn’t say this, but the Roma really are [insert X stereotype here], and I know that because of [insert Y story about a trip to Europe]”

/scrolling

Let’s be real here.

Best sports hair past and present:

Well, if he’s that serious about emulating Napoleon, I’m up for sending Bannon to a desolate island to spend the rest of his life in the company of some scary green wallpaper.

The main thing I find attractive about Lil’ Yachty is that he pisses the old-heads off.

“No, it’s Hydra. Hi-drah.”

“It’s just hard to believe the dog was nasty when she took Lamby to every green room with her when Girls was still a thing 4 years ago.”

That’s 2017 for you. You assume the weirdest news you’re going to get out of Brazilian soccer is a convicted murderer being signed to a new contract, and then next thing you know you get some guy trying to test out Ehrlich’s maximum optimal jerk-off theories from Silicon Valley in the locker room shower.

Shortly after the video made its way onto the internet last Friday, the club confirmed that all four players had been released

Yeah, I knew what I was getting. That’s why I voted against the sexist, racist, homophobic, transphobic, incestual, paranoid, idiotic, treasonous, poorphobic, greedy, eduphobic, evil, climate denying shit pile.

Off topic: do you think Mitch McConnell has ever successfully brought a woman to orgasm?