please stick to basketball and social issues. you don’t know anything about peekaboo

-Probably the only Preds fan o̶n̶ ̶t̶h̶i̶s̶ ̶s̶i̶t̶e̶

That’s productive saber-rattling from a young guy not willing to be buffaloed into a contract extension.

I reached down to find any feeling or ounce of emotional sympathy for Boston’s poor luck here but there was nothing there

In the last 24 hours, the Celtics went down 0-2 to a laughable Bulls team, Aaron Hernandez committed suicide, and Gronk yukked it up with a propaganda minister nobody respects.

“Big, fucking deal.”
-The Fanciest Dog

Just remember that he has a small penis and all will be well

As a Caps fan, I wasn’t even driven to drink last night. The whiskey was there. I just took my dog for a walk instead.

The 19-year-old returned to the game in the third period with a full shield, but couldn’t make it to overtime because his eye had swelled completely shut.

If this were the KHL that’d be a cigarette in his nose

This is the best time of the year for hockey. Dudes sacrifice their bodies on the ice, I sacrifice my free time and liver. We all win.

Tis but a flesh wound.

Very classy moves by the Hurricanes organization. Nice work supporting Bickell on this.

Fucking allergies always act up at the weirdest times.

And for just a second, she was queen. All of her troubles forgotten. Life felt better, filled with purpose. No matter that soon she would be walking out of that stadium and back into the cold reality of living in Pittsburgh, she would forever have this moment. The girls at the end of the Heinz Cocktail Sauce…

Rumor has it the cheerleaders were also part of a pyramid scheme.

Looks like a rat, fucks rats. Ratfuck.

Well, he fucks rats, what more do you want?

“Unfortunately, I do not have the same aptitude for the written word, but if I did I can assure you that my tale would be about the most epic love story — ours.”