I’m a bit older, and I absolutely fucking loathe that song.

Take into consideration this particular contributor’s history at the Wirecutter, and adjust your expectations of professionalism accordingly.

Assholes.

Remind me again who comprises the bulk of industry & politics in the US. 

A bit of laudanum never hurts. 

Yes! Some finely grated (microplaned, or pound the everloving hell out of it in a mortar & pestle) fresh ginger is an excellent addition, if you really want that bite.

Absolutely. Make it hurt them personally & collectively.

There’s no need to lane split if traffic is light, genius. 

How about we just send all of them?

Still, probably better than Wisconsin.

To be expected from that dude, based on previous comments.

All the best local joints do.

Fuck every establishment that doesn’t take cash, for a whole host of reasons. No, I can’t be arsed to put a single donut on a card of any sort, you dumb fucks (Top Pot Donuts in Seattle, you didn’t strike me as assholes). I’d rather not bother with anything under $10 on a card, frankly.

Make it a cheap, dry(ish) bubbly something-or-other. Cheap cava or prosecco > cheap Cali “champagne”. (Goes incredibly well with heavily buttered & salted popcorn [or other salty snacks], too!)

That sounds like a terrible euphemism for dildos & butt chugging

They could do worse.

This is Mars.

Someone in Oscar Meyer’s c-suite is a sounding enthusiast.