If only there were some incredibly simple way to know.

He?

Pendantic!

Can’t argue with that!

Is a self-inflicted rectal-cranial impaction really something he should waste a doctor’s time with?

Nor am I willing to take lessons from a dangerous maniac.

Right there with with you. 

You were thinking of the wrong hac- I mean, writer.

Incorrect.

What about “maple” makes you think of fall? That sure as hell isn’t when sugaring happens.

Cider jelly for anything pork-based. Hard to find outside of Vermont, but absolutely worth tracking down. (Or make your own, if you’ve got a source of high quality cider.)

Bill’s an idiot, and feels the need to demonstrate it often. 

It’s truly disgusting. 

“Pendantic”

Barf.

How about a nice, stoic divorce? Maybe she’d enjoy one of those.

Fuckin’ herbs

Terrible, regardless of motivation. 

The off-putting, recently-joined-a-cult vibe of their cashiers was enough to stop me shopping there. No one needs to be that interested in my grocery purchases.

Well, that’s disappointing.