At least this will prevent employees from cleaning up as customers. Theoretically.

Standing room may make things more accessible for kids but I can attest to years of going to Australian football games as a kid, and all I saw in standing room was beer and broken meat pies sloshing onto the ground. Kids will enjoy the game a lot more from a seat.

In preseason, Goff looked like he’d be a longshot to beat you to the starting QB slot, Mr. Petchesky. Have you thought about trying out for the Rams?

Looking at film later, Rex could spot all three holes in the defense.

Also, push for 1. compulsory voting, and 2. instant runoff voting.

Trump will be lucky to get 5% of the vote in DC. Maryland’s a lost cause. Could sway 5 idiots in VA, I guess.

I love you, Drew. Unreservedly and unashamedly.

Points for the Onion reference.

The thrower was, presumably, in the Texas Book Suppository.

Was there a second dildo? Where’s Zapruder when you need him?

It’s fourth down and about 10 inches.

That’s a deep dish of misery, alright.

If he had played in the NFL, Goodell would right now be holding a presser to announce a four game suspension.

Not exactly advanced in a statistical sense - triple crown stats drove the whole engine. But it had a great editor for logos, so I redrew all the generic ones to be like the real thing.

Why are they examining Huma Abedin’s devices for the sexting case? Do they really think she handed her phone over and said “go for it, horndog.”

He’s learned to turn the other cheek.

He would have faced better than scrubs - Fall League is top prospects, with the sad exception of Tim Tebow. Still a long way from Kluber, though.

Good question. You really should get something for that.

Go right. Further right. Completely out of bounds. Further.

A thoroughly entertaining game for me. Entirely because my fantasy opponent was trying to chase down my 79 point lead with Russell Wilson and Tyler Lockett.