Opened the gates at noon for a primetime game.

Well thank god half of them remembered to pack condoms full of meth up their butts.

He’s not so big a star that he requires six urinals to pee in. Fuck that guy.

Go on...

This is a slightly expansive reading of the word ”famous.”

I actually have more respect for a guy who steals from sick kids than a guy who goes to Power Rangers conventions.

New Jersey isn’t hell on Earth.

As a millennial I can assure you this is not a meme.

Brian Kelly’s ability to escape blame at Catholic Institutions is so good that they’re going to name him archbishop of the Boston diocese.

I get his very basic premise that, in general, a stir fry can be bland, but am with you on his replacement suggestion being utter bullshit. I make stir fry a lot so I can get meat/veggies/grains in one serving and only have to cook once or twice a week. Don’t mix the meat/veggies with the rice to store it, make a…

I want to see who keeps voting for Clemens but won’t vote for Bonds. That person will need to show their TRUMP card this year. I mean come on, at least the “we don’t vote for cheaters” crew can claim that. Voting for Clemens but not Bonds shows you only like the white.

Finally, we get to see who voted for *&&Mxxx, MU#x—@@ to get in on the first ballot.. I have my sneaking suspicions it’s Gammons.

I know all the focus was on Kaep and how fucking terrible he was, but I’m just excited that the Bears rookies look legitimately outstanding. Howard with 3 TDs, Floyd with 2 sacks and a safety, Cody Whitehair looks like a sound Center. The future looks bright and oh god, they doing it to me again, they’re making me…

Are you referring to the uniforms or just allowing the Rams themselves on the field?

It’s good to see that a league that allows this to be on the field is so concerned about the fashion sense its players exhibit.

The punishment is fair, if you ask me. I wore a similar outfit recently, and got told to “please stop vaping,” and “remain at least 500 yards away from the elementary school.”

Except that he promised to visit Pakistan. Which actually is an important diplomatic act. Obama refused to visit Pakistan to show his discontent with the inability of their leaders to control the Taliban and their continued aggressive acts towards india. Did he consciously mean to reverse long-standing US foreign…

I’m not sure what’s sadder: the lack of substance or the fact that they definitely cleaned up his prose.

Why read your win-loss records from left to right? Why not right to left, in which case the 76ers were a dynastic 591-74 under Hinkie’s tenure?

Doc Rivers: Hold me back! Hold me back!