Only if you’re female. Alcohol is magical that way. It makes men not responsible for their own actions and women responsible for everyone’s else.

So basically...men are uncontrollable rapists who will use every opportunity to assault you and you should have known that you stupid, stupid girl. But also, don’t be so mean and think all men are rapists. Obviously, calling out a man’s deplorable behavior is just as bad as the behavior itself.

When Death take a holiday, he likes to relax.

which is remarkably funny, because melania totally aped the first lady’s speech, in heels.

I wish I had the courage to tweet this to Jared Kushner

Jez should create a living document of all these stories. There are already hundreds and it’s been four days.

Same.every Trump supportingmember of my family is getting a membership to the NAACP this holiday season. And Im answering every hateful post they make on sociel media. No more unfollow/unfrinding for me. Time to educate

I donated to planned parenthood and then got a lecture from a family member about dead babies. So I donated again, double my original amount, in said family member’s name.

I’m going to build a wormhole generator to escape into a better universe. Who wants to fund my generator and/or come with me?

Hopefully today will be my first full day of work. Yesterday I was sent home, “not as a reprimand, but to calm down and get some perspective.”

#MakeTheIronIslandsGreatAgain

Nice to see Huma has finally sworn off Weiner for good.

I Have No Mocha and I Must Cream

“I voted for Clinton but regret it because someone who works for her used to be married to someone who texted a picture of his junk to my teenaged daughter and she maybe checked her email once on her husband’s computer. Hillary didn’t know anything about any of this until last week, and she has never mentioned my…

It makes me feel as though the respect due to me as a human being is feigned in my presence