Hey now, the College Park Applebees is where I did a lot of my learn-to-not-be-an-asshole-in-a-restaurant training as a toddler. It serves a purpose dammit.

One trays all went on to a big conveyor belt by the exit with a narrow walkway out. There was a person standing by with a trash can. You could hand your tray to the hippie to scrape the food off onto the trash can, scrape it off yourself, or you could put it on the belt and the hippie would take it off and scrape the…

IDK there is also the thing where sometimes people just get full quickly and don't want anymore. Sometimes I have a hard time judging. I don't know why I am so against this—maybe it's because I typically have eyes bigger than my stomach so I do tend to leave stuff. I have a lot of carryout leftover containers in my…

If you don't know whether you'd like it, you take one piece and come back for more if you thought it was good. Buffets are designed for multiple trips.

i'm actually really pleased that she went back and apologized. taking responsibility for your own asinine behaviour is good manners and the next best thing to never behaving in an asinine fashion.

Ok, so it's totally fair to not like sushi and people shouldn't be made fun of for not liking sushi. BUT WHO GOES TO A MICHELIN-STARRED SUSHI RESTAURANT IF THEY DON'T LIKE (or don't know if they like) SUSHI?!?!

You've never had new england clam chowder?

True, especially smoked turkey corn chowder.

I think the cream + seafood rule is a little overplayed; it can be done right if the chef knows what they're doing. You can particularly get away with it with something like shrimp or bay scallops if you've a deft chef's hand. Where it doesn't work is in shit like lobster mac and cheese.

I really hope the hosts decided to end the friendships with all those cheap, selfish, petty, horrible women. Where the hell do these people come from, and why did no one teach them manners?

I don't understand people who try to make their own lemonade at restaurants. Fountain drinks usually are only $2-$3. Is that really going to break you? Plus, you get free refills, so if you're feeling miserly, you can just be sure you get 3 or 4 refills, which means you paid about $.50 for a glass.

Don't forget "hey, if you hate serving so much, go get a real job!"

Oh my god I would have made it my personal mission in life to track down those women and slather their homes in disgusting cake and red dye.

MAKING YOUR OWN LEMONADE??!?!

#ServersAreHorribleToo #WhyWon'tYouDoaBCOAboutServers #CompleteLackofSelfAwareness

DID YOU KNOW ONE TIME A SERVER DIDN'T CLEAN THE BATHROOM WHEN I DEMANDED IT SO I HAD THEM FIRED?!?!

The party with the spite cake can go to Tartarus.

I glanced upon this cake and thought 'yum, cake!.. I'm gonna hate cake forever after this installment, aren't I?'

I just hope there's never a big a freedom spill in the ocean. Who knows what the sea life would do then.

Some people forget how much Freedom the soldiers harvest for us. When they head off to foreign nations that have no means to attack us or change our laws, they're actually harvesting massive quantities of Freedom which we all need to thank them for, every day actually. The giant tanker ships full of Freedom come at…