Lets break this down by gender, political affiliation, sexual orientation and just to make it somehow sports-related, preferred major sport. I demand SCIENCE damnit!

There is a damn good reason why yellow doesn't even get a mention. It is ranked below "get a colonoscopy".

" Simmons is just like the Lupicas and the Mariottis—someone who fancies himself an oracle..."

"What your country will look like after we destroy you".

Next thing I wanna hear about this guy is that he died in a fire while a bunch of women stood around with fire extinguishers, laughing and throwing change at him.

Islander fan here. Just this once, we will be accomodating and take your best player off your hands for ya. We have Rick Dipietro and and Alexi Yashin (yes, he is STILL being paid) in return.

Lust at 1st sight for this guy.

Yes, but sprawled in your side flopping around in generally considered poor form while play continues.

Never has a hacked Twitter account been so lacking in imagination. This has to be the work of an 11 year old.

Sometimes the shooter makes you look good. 30+ years of goaltending here, and absolutely no way JQ stops that if elevated. Better lucky than good sometimes.

Not pictured: The Kobelicious "Rapey Raspberry".

"Tag me in" guy was in attendance.

She is just so incredibly doable in that "hot housewife next door" kinda way, LOVE women like like.

More like inedible, those things are damn gross.

Empusa comes to mind, what with her donkey leg and all.

Well Sean you are 13 years from the age where I had the widow-maker, died on the table, crossed over then freaked everyone the fuck out by opening my eyes. 13 years bud, and my youngest was five at the time so you know that would have sucked.

Direct correlation to the number of pennicilian shots available.

Took a second. Fucking brilliant. +1

Sometimes being hot just isn't enough. But you know, sometimes it is.

In a word? "Fabulous".