The ferocious Bob Gibson, who hit 15 fewer batters than Orel Hersheiser despite pitching 700-odd more innings? 

First tunnel before the climb on Space Mountain?

I just hope it lives up to the Mad Magazine parody of the 1976 version, ‘A Star’s a Bomb.’ 

Dutch was good while being showy, as opposed to the guys who are showy instead of being good. Probably a tie with Doug Harvey for the ump I most respected in the 80s.

Not Without My T-Rex.

I don’t think he’s the slam-dunk first-ballot guy many of my fellow Cards fans seem to think he is, but I suspect the defensive rep and 2000 hits (if he gets there) will eventually get him there. Won’t break my heart if he doesn’t make it, tho.

Edit: And he ought to get a couple of games for the shove.

Mike Trout had a 10+ win season in 2012 and got paid $510K in 2013. Pham has had exactly one season since 2012 where he stayed healthy enough to get over 350 ABs at any level(s). As a Cardinals fan, he’s a fun player to watch. He also pretty clearly plays better with a giant chip on his shoulder. Smart of the Cards to…

Drew sounds nostalgic for his old 1992 LeBaron.

Also not your worst parenting moment. Delayed gratification is a pretty important concept.

So you do get it.

To be fair, That’s So Bettman™ is just a sequel to That’s So Ziegler™, who took the league off of ESPN and moved it to SportsChannel America.

Did Margary lodge a formal protest to this article, or did he settle for bitching and frothing in the staff meeting?

Seriously, thanks for the clarification. I can almost promise that we’ll legitimately embarrass ourselves soon, and without any fictional assistance

Somewhere, Dale Hunter silently weeps to himself.