“Griffey got in with 99.32 percent of ballots—or all but three of them. We eagerly await those voters’ explanations.”

I agree, but many people believe that Irsay’s fingerprints were all over that trade.

Far easier to hope that NFL-compliant networks just sweep it under the rug then go through a messy libel lawsuit, where all sorts of embarrassing things can be brought out.

“ bloviator, a dummy, a bad Facebook person, a hilariously incompetent businessman”

“I’m not exactly sure where Johnny is. Haven’t talked to him. I know our football people will be on top of that.’’

The thing I love most about that tweet is that it suggests—correctly— that a cocktail waitress is as reliable a source as a sportswriter when it comes to verifying whether someone in a bar is Johnny Manziel.

Someone, quick, ask him what existed before the Big Bang.

Wait, THIS guy is a hilarious moron? Get the fuck outta here with that!!

“white performative liberal tendencies”—This isn’t SJW bingo— the words you string together actually have to *mean* something when you put them in a sentence.

/wishes to subscribe to your newsletter

“I get that kids aren’t as talented with their bladder and bowel control, but why the yoga mat?”

“A spokesperson for the Texans replied, and said Watt broke his hand during a drill.”

Sounds like someone’s a frustrated Michigan fan.

THE Ohio State, rookie.

My first concert was “The New Mamas and the Papas” at the San Diego Wild Animal Park. I fell asleep. Your daughter wins.

From Kawakami:

THIS WOULD NOT HAVE HAPPENED WITH TOKYO SEXWALE.

Well, if you’re the type to leave a company gathering and return to kill your co-workers, I’m guessing you’re not the type to carefully plan for your infant daughter’s future.

Thanks to TMZ for helpfully including the arrow showing that the guy who is about 8” taller than everyone else is the NBA player.

The book “Ghost Map” talks about a lot of this in its discussion of a cholera outbreak that killed a ton of people in London in the 1850s. Ultimately the cause was discovered to be contaminated drinking water from a particular public pump, but people back then didn’t really understand the connection between sanitation…