Happy birthday!

I won’t even shop for clothing in retail stores anymore because they are always a season or two ahead. Trying to find some new gloves in February after you tore yours shoveling? Sorry, we clearances those out in October to make room for bathing suits...in New England.

This is true of a lot of clothing stores. I’m not going to pay a ridiculous amount of money for a sweater made of acrylic yarn.

I think a major challenge for J.Crew/Gap/Banana/American Eagle is two-fold:

Antarctic ice ring.

Yes, like this.

Stanley Kubrick was hired to fake the moon landing, but he’s such a perfectionist he insisted on filming on location.

He was taught that the earth is round and all that good stuff, he just chooses not to believe it. I think this is more about the Internet, really.

Yeah, we’d need more than one edge though. If it is disc-shaped, there’d be tons of edges. Even if you assume square-shaped, that would mean 4 edges. If Antarctica is the only edge, that would mean Antarctica is all around us? WTF?

Someone on Twitter that this dude will be finding out the Earth is hard.

But has he already reproduced? If he has, this is of limited valuableness.

Yeah this is a Darwin awards in the making.

So I know that 1,800 feet is high enough to efficiently terminate him upon “landing,” but is it high enough that he’ll know he was wrong before he dies? Asking for a friend.

On the bright side, some limo driver is going to get more work.

Hmmm... $20,000 for a rocket to go 1800 feet, or $300 for a short distance commercial flight with a window seat at 39,000 feet.

One can only hope...there are already too many stupid people. One less isn’t a bad thing.

Great. Do it. Bye Felicia.

Oh he ded.

Your first sentence is gold.