Right? I’ve never understood the double-standard. It’s like they don’t hear themselves or understand what they’re reading. Don’t get me wrong, these guys are entitled to their opinions, and if they can find that lady that wants to be with a sexist, angry shithead, congrats. It just seems like a waste of time and…

We used to have a package liquor across the street from my old condo, and they had Cave Creek Chili Beer as part of the make your own 6-pack. I always put one in, because it was such a crazy flavor - like drinking a bottle of nachos.

Tell her the same thing that I tell my relatives when they start telling me about how persecuted they are. “You’re not losing any rights, guys,” I tell them, “Everyone else is catching up to the rights that you’ve enjoyed all of these years. You have every right to worship in whatever ridiculous way that you choose,…

He had the best line in the movie:

Ha! So much nudity in heaven for people that wear so much clothing on earth. Maybe that’s the rationale for the super long hair? Poor Tobias Funke - a nevernude at the gates of heaven, barred for his jean shorts that barely cover his thunder.

You’ve done a great public service here. If I’m wrong, and there is a heaven/hell/god/space baby jebus/giant turtle I finally know what to say when I get there. I’m going to get cards printed so I’ll remember.

Ray Stantz disagrees with you. IN HIS DREAMS

It’s Colin Quinn. Case closed.

Red Lobster in St Louis is super popular. People who never eat out come for their big fancy dinner once a month, and have no idea how to behave.

But, but, this was a Christian! They get all the free speech!

I actually got 4 or 5 notes on how nice I was, that I was funny and made their experience better and all of that. That was the only negative one that I ever received. I got a really nice one once from a couple that both came in in wheelchairs. They drank so much pink lemonade that I brought them out a pitcher, but set…

I had someone leave me a note at Red Lobster that said “Hopefully, receiving no tip from us teaches you that you should not be so flippant with your customers. We did not appreciate being called “folks” and “guys”. Refer to your customers as sir or ma’am in the future.” Dude, you’re at RED LOBSTER. I was wearing a…

Buy this umbrella. Best beach umbrella I’ve ever owned.

That is absolutely not an irrational anger. I didn’t eat there for years on work trips because I wasn’t paying cash out of my own pocket for throw’d rollz. I’d have to fill out a reimbursement form! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

I’ve been there a few times. The worst transgression there is that they don’t take credit cards, but YOU CAN PAY WITH A CHECK. It’s so weird. Food’s good, though.

Donald Trump is Lyle Lanley.

Jonathon Hickman gets the FF. I really loved his run from 2010-2014 or so.

My wife’s aunt had never seen that video until I made her watch it Saturday. I think I broke her brain.

TINY penis. Micropenis? Baby penis? That’s generally the cause.

I mean...