Would anyone be interested in my similarly-themed DIY article, "Everything I Fucked Up While Trying To Act Like Anthony Bourdain For Most of My Twenties"?

Salaries are usually paid out of a firm's operating budget. If the owners or shareholders (represented in corporations by the Board of Directors, especially the compensation committee) decide that they want to pay a CEO fifty mil in salary one year...then what basis is there for arguing that the firm shouldn't have…

it's a question of whether the particular lawyer who has uncritically represented the same serial child molester for over a decade has outed himself as an unethical piece of shit. And the answer is yes.

Sure, it's a fine spring day to Await Silent Tristero's Empire. (Link SFW.)

And the confusion's not going to get any easier for you, I'm afraid.

Well me too, I guess — but when I get milfed I don't go complaining to the press about it.

No, no, that's just Edward Scissorhands. It's a common mistake.

While playing keeper, I once let in a goal that bounced over me. It's one of those memories I just pretend happened to someone else.

Probably off-topic, but I'm outing myself here as someone who, while agreeing with every word of this post, also has a sincere appreciation for powdered eggs.

Spider Guy...who goes by "Kate"?

Maybe you see a bold young man speaking truth to power in [the author]'s various proclamations, but I see an image-conscious asshole branding himself as exactly the kind of [writer] fans and, especially, [editors] were desperate for at the time.

The thing about Boston is, the cars and bikes are mostly traveling at the same speed. It's just impossible to hit multiple consecutive green lights in this town.

If any e-mail ever cried out to be made into a flowchart, it's this one.

You're all a bunch of Spider-lovers.

Please don't screw with my Mindy Kaling fantasies, people. I ask so little.

I've seen these comparison pics before — maybe even on Gawker Media. And each time, I have the same reaction: If anyone else has had more astounding cosmetic-surgery outcomes than Julie Chen...then I wonder who it is. It seems like the work she had done was absolutely top-shelf. Who could possibly surpass it?

Wait, why was Drew living in the DMV? Just how long are those lines?

I'm positive that Tom Coughlin has shat himself in his pants multiple times.

Yeah, tedious propagandizing. Everybody hates that. Right?

I imagine most vermin parties take place in TRUMP-branded buildings.