Nobody’s fantasy team was pinning their hopes on Tony Romo for the last four years he was on an active roster.

Jason Witten made me yearn for Booger MacFarland to swap places only so that Booger’s goofy-ass chair could malfunction and launch him into the night sky of Tampa or Pittsburgh.

He looks like Tony Robbins had surgery in an attempt to look more like Casey Affleck.

SHUT THE FUCK UP, BOOMER.

But when you’re coaching the Browns, do the losses really count?

Sure, maybe...but only if you define a “loser” as someone who loses.

Dwight’s greatest contribution as a Laker might have been this gif:

I thought we established he didn't know how to shoot.

Concentration camps imply that Americans are putting all Latinos in camps, not just the ones who are ILLEGALLY entering the country

Jon Jones is not exactly an expert on front ends.

And there are finishing moves that take so long that they feel like deliberate parodies of the idea of finishing movies themselves. I’m thinking specifically of Scotty 2 Hotty’s “The Worm,” which was easily as silly as Orange Cassidy’s whole thing.

This here is probably the best way to look at it. I’ve cringed at various wrestling comedy before almost instantly realising what it is I am watching. From that point things that shouldn’t make me laugh get chuckles. Best example for me was actually in WWE. I hated Santino Marela with a passion at first, but damn if I …

That was a pithier reply than I'd have expected from him, but it's probably not the first time he finished quickly talking about feet.

He’s a role model for every high school kid, surviving a cock block on the way to second base.

Shawn Carter is a capitalist and he is capitalizing off of another man’s efforts to further enrich himself. He did it in filling the void left Biggie and Pac’s untimely passing. It’s the American way and from a business perspective it makes perfect sense. The problem is his attempt to frame it any other way than…

For the remainder of the preseason, Nagy will make Long barf on the exact same spot of the field until he gets it right.

“Correction: We’re more than 2+ years removed from our last really interesting basketball.” 

That college team had Webber, Penny, Grant Hill, Allan Houston . . . I might take them right now over this U.S. team.

That chessmaster of a move was some next level thinking. He had to show them with all of the talent they had they can still be beat. Knowing how competitive they were it worked too damn well.