my husband always orders the hamburger or the salmon. his life seems a bit limited, sometimes.

are you married to me?

oh, yes, my daughter suffered a perinatal stroke and her face is crooked. she is only 10, so she is still pretty, but i guess we should prepare for her to look weird to people as an adult.

i can confirm that my mentally handicapped daughter of nearly 11, who would struggle to write this letter but is a fairly bright kid, is one of trump's most sincere opponents.

too bad the helicopter wasn't on the roof of a building.

they were expecting and preparing for an invasion, weren't they? at least, that's how antiope justifies starting young diana's training in spite of hippolyta's wishes.

guys, should we tell him?

this asshole again?

but the movies chastain is talking about, the ones shown at cannes, have very little to do with hollywood-style summer blockbusters, and given what i've read about the latest françois ozon, her concern might have as much to do with the portrayal of women as with their visibility.

there's always fast food jobs.

oh, so that's where the bathroom panic comes from!

or the mice. they've done it before.

we are the animals. after we leave, they'll just do it again—some stupid species will self-select to invent society and fuck it all up. again.

getting away from this guy might make the texting forgivable. you know, like "yes, your honor, i broke my neighbor's car's window and hot-wired it, but it was because i needed to take their son to the hospital before he bled out" forgivable.

it now looks like she might have had a good reason to text in a movie theater, and i am not one to grant that privilege lightly. (like i normally think there should be a phone collecting bin at the entrance). that would be a 'please, friend, get me out of this date' type of reason.

there's a guy who eats the internet?

been having a love affair with tarragon lately.

also try shaved fennel with a good quantity of high quality shaved parmesan and chopped mint, dressed with olive oil and lemon juice.

that man's nuggets! get 'em! oh, wait, that's not how it works, is it?

upvoted for consistency and integrity.