I'm not sure this will help speed up the game.

Full view

Mark Sanchez just found his dream center.

It's not local authorities coming up with the descriptor; it's the legal name of the offense, differentiating it from assaults with a weapon or in connection with a separate crime. If I punch you in the face because I don't like the look of you, it's simple assault (which is what used to be called "assault and…

Gawker Media: Where We Excoriate White People For Trying to Rap but Encourage Them to Write Overwrought Musings on Hip Hop

Also, Adam Schefter and Darren Rovell share the same vomit bag that they call a brain:

This is not what they mean when they talk about working your way up through the minors.

Well, the Trojan is broken, but at least he pulled the little guy out in time.

Terrible. Odds are for something like hypertrophic cardiomyopathy, which springs seemingly out if nowhere and kills otherwise healthy athletes a few times a year. It's kind of a case study in healthcare costs because you could screen every college football player for it and prevent these deaths, but that means doing…

Well I got blocked after I adarn'd ESPN

Thankfully, @RealPeterson2for1 is behind bars now.

If Ted Cruz watched this, he'd probably have a brain aneurysm.

Delonte West would have delivered 1 dozen weapons to the home and try to have sex with the mom who resides at the residence.

KOBE WOULD HAVE SENT TWICE AS MANY, PERSONALLY SIGNED EVERY CARD, AND HAND DELIVERED THOSE GOD DAMN CUPCAKES!!!

I like that LeBron apologizes in infographic form.

Could "Sasha's" refusal to back check be one of the reasons she's referring to?

It was actually even worse than that. He called the poor guy a "Cowherd".

Based on how he was raised, I'm surprised Hunter didn't slap the umpire back. His parents instilled the importance of an "i for an i".

maybe he shouldn't have punched the guy in his neck?